Reset Button

We all have hit the reset button sometime in our life. We seen it with dieting, quitting habits, exercising, or even school. I have few things that I hit the reset button on. The first one is my college. I am thankful that most of my classes are transferable, so I do not need to redo all my college classes. I went back to go for my Business Administration. It is a safer degree, and I already have 4 years of experience in the field. Logically, it makes sense for me to go back into business. Am I giving up on my dream? I don’t think so. I am trying to make logical sense to my change.

My next reset is my career path. My plan was to convert to a personal trainer. I am passionate for fitness, and I want to help people. This career choice felt like I could make it. But, I have to put the dream on hold. It wasn’t meant to be for Crunch Fitness. I’ll be back into an office setting soon. I do personal training on the side as my part time job. I think if I do personal training as a part time, and an office job as my full time. Stability is important to control anxiety.

My final reset button is my mentality. I always had a strong mental health. I was lucky that I never suffered from depression or anxiety. Knowing that my family is prone to these problems. My recent medication affected my mentality so much. It put me into a depressive state. I did not think I could achieve anything or become a personal trainer. Now, I want to stop that mentality and make commitments. I want this blog to be busy and I want to work hard on it. I do see a future in these blog post and hopefully it will come true.

Talkative Tuesday: Apology Rights and Wrongs

I’m sorry. A common way to ask for forgiveness. Many people have said it for the smallest issue to the biggest problem. I wanted to cover apology videos from the YouTube community. This article will point out the do and don’ts in apology videos. I recommend watching these videos to get a clear understanding.

Let’s get the most popular apology out of the way. Laura Lee video. Here are a few facts about Laura Lee. She is a beauty content creator. She has about 4.4 million followers on YouTube. She had a line with Ulta, but they dropped her due to previous tweets that was directed to the black, fat, and Asian communities. Let’s go over all the don’ts in her video.

  1. Is to not to cry during the entire video. It is going to be hard for your audience to understand you. You cannot convey or try to trick your audience with a sad song. Be real with them.
  2. Own up to your action. You are the only person to blame. You may have not blame anyone, but you did not address the main issue. Being dumb in the past is common. We may feel invincible in the moment, but it will nip you in the butt. Do not assume that your audience knows what the main issue is. It feels kind of sketchy.
  3. Ignore the main issue. YOU tweeted insensitive tweets that you created not retweeted. The main issue is not that you tweeted that. It’s that people think that you are a racist and a body shamer. Prove them wrong. Tell them that you said things that are not okay but state that is not who you are TODAY.
  4. Bringing up family death threat. If you are in serious danger of a threat, report to the police and do not say anything. The police wants to investigate the situation without sparking attentions. Bringing up that your family is receiving threats shows 2 things. You are either lying about it or you are making the problem worst by letting the viewers know that your family is vulnerable.
    That is all that needs to be covered for Laura Lee. This is a great example of what not to do for an apology. Overall the video is a hot mess. Feels kind of fake.

Next person is Brittnay Dawn. I do not know too much about her. She is a Instagram fitness influencer that has over 500k followers on Instagram. Known for creating a positive fitness page for women empowering them to be happy with themselves. How she does this is by embracing positive body image, informing them about healthy life choices with products, workout tips, and motivation. Well, a lump sum of her customers got scammed from her when they signed up for her coaching. All these complaints started stirring up with her calling her a scam artist. We will go over her don’ts. Here is her apology video

  1. Most of her apology followed the same format as Laura Lee’s video. Same point. The major difference is that Brittnay reads off a script. I get it. Some people can’t hold themselves together. But having this factor makes it feel phony to me. Almost like a robot is reading the speech. I do not feel the empathy she has for the situation.
  2. Stating that you are showing your raw emotions does not carry well to the audience. It sounds very artificial. It is like an actor stating that they are sad during a movie. We do not need someone to tell us that you are being emotion when you are showing it. Remember action speaks louder than words. Show the audience that you are being real instead of stating it.
    Overall, Brittnay’s apology was similar to Laura’s both seem staged or fake. At least with Brittnay she took responsibility for her action and has a solution to her issue.

These two showed a great way to make a bad apology. However, there are great ways and tips to make a progressive apology. Jenna Marble is a great example. One of the original Youtubers starting small and now slowly climbing to 20 million subscribers. I have been such a huge fan of Jenna since 2010. She has been a great inspiration to many viewers with her funny videos, quirky personality, dramaless life, passion for animals, and so many more. If you hearing how great she is, why did she even make an apology video? Well back in November 2017, she made a video called “So we bought fish”. The video displayed how she bought some fish and she did some incorrect purchases that caused the fish stress like a round fish bowl. Making her seem like she made the pet decision like a foolish purchase. She did not do too much research going in this purchase or new addition to the family. To be fair, we are not all experts in everything. This is why we need to seek for advice for topic that we are unsure about. Her feedback on the video was not really too negative but more like constructive criticism. Here is the video for reference. Let us go over everything she did right in her apology.

  1. She addressed why she deleted the video. This helps the viewers to assume that she is not hiding anything this action does not seem shady at all. It is very important that people do not try to cover the truth.
  2. She talks what she did wrong AND what is the main issue with her action. Jenna admitted at fault, and she tells us why what she did does not represent her true self. She is an animal lover and she treats them as family no matter how small. What she did wrong was that she did not learn about the fish requirements to a healthy living style. Then, she talks about how making impulsive pet purchases can be an issue, but reassures the viewer that she cares about every animal.
  3. Fixing the problem. Instead of returning the fish with shame or keeping them in the same condition, she purchased all the items the fish experts said to buy for a better living space. This shows that Jenna truly cares about her fish and there is no price that is too much for her pets. This has been shown multiple time with her dogs and hamster. She made them homemade treats, took them to vet and paid for any surgical procedures to have more moments to share, she made a living space for her pets, she feeds them high quality meals, and so many loving and caring actions. It was not a surprise to me that she went out and bought the new supplies immediately, and I respect her even more.
  4. Making her mistake as a lesson for a teachable moment for future pet buyers. Jenna said her sorry and fixed the problem so why does she need to do more? Well, she explains to her fans that she wants to make this moment a teachable moment. She wants people to use her video as a reference when it comes to buying pets. I love this idea. We make mistakes everyday, but the point of having these mistakes is to make sure that we learn a lesson from it. I find that beautiful that she was able to teach the viewer what are the dos and don’ts.
  5. Showing that she is being raw and real instead of saying. She is not wearing any makeup, no script, no flattering angles, and looks like she just got out of bed. If this does not show real, I don’t know what does.
  6. Keeping her original video at the end. Jenna’s video is about 30 minutes long for just the apology portion, then 15 minutes for the orignal. She wants people to refer to that video instead of her just telling the video.

Jenna is the realest Youtuber out of all them. It was no surprise that she knows how to be professional when addressing the issue. I truly feel like she is very sorry for her actions. She is a great person and shows it too. I will always be a giant fan of her work.

Lastly, the next Youtube channel has been a channel that I have followed since it first started. The GameGrumps is a wild gaming channel that pushes the boundaries of let’s play channels. Saying, doing, and playing the craziest things from race jokes, sexism, homosexuality, family issue jokes, and so many more. I will say take their jokes with a grain of salt. The people on the show are no means racist, sexist, homophobic, or anti anything. This is what makes GameGrumps who they are. Jokesters talking about controversial topics in a funny matter. This should be a great way for us to perceive the world. We all have to laugh about something once in a while. With a following of 5.5 million people and over 6000 videos, you might be thinking their apology is something that they said. However, it was about the channel not uploading a week holiday special. They have a week segment dedicated to Halloween during October. They will play usually horror games or Halloween related games. Making the holiday more festive. In 2018, fans noticed that they did not do a Ghoul Grumps that year. Making fans reaching out to Arin and Danny stating that they don’t care. My issue is not with GameGrumps but their fans. I will address later why us fans were in the wrong at the end of the post and why I am defending Arin. But let’s go over his video addressing the problem. (I do get emotion with this video because I feel like Arin is saying sorry for something he did not do)

  1. Taking the entire blame for his team and redirecting the issue to mainly him. Arin is a grown man that can be perceived as a child due to his tone in his funny videos. When he stated that he is the only one to blame shows that he cares for his company and team. I truly respect him for that and makes me feel warm and teary.
  2. Using a proper tone and showing anxious body language. This shows that Arin is really serious about the matter, and he’s truly showing that he is nervous about the issue. I find it remarkable that he is being open about it. This is how you show emotions. It helps remind the viewers that he is human.
  3. Explains why he did not upload it. He took on so many new project that people don’t realize that he does more than play video games. He helps with his wife’s channel, started a new segment, goes on tour, records numbers of episodes for GameGrumps, and so many more. He is a trooper for growing this company.
  4. Offering us options for solutions. Arin made it open for debate if viewers wanted to receive Ghoul Grumps in December for like a Nightmare Before Christmas theme. It is very admirable that he gives us a choices to help solve the problem.

His apology was real and makes me so emotional. I love that his apology is the same rights as Jenna’s. My opinion on the matter is that this apology was not needed for us fans. As a fan, we DO NOT have to right to call out a creator for forgetting a segment. It is rude and toxic. We do not deserve Ghoul Grumps. Think of Ghoul Grumps as a dessert. It is not necessary for a human to indulge in desserts to finish a meal. We get it as a treat and if we do not get that treat who cares. We are not entitled to Ghoul Grumps because WE DID NOT create the segment. The only one that has the right to make or skip Ghoul Grumps is Arin. Unless there is a pure reason why we deserve every year, I am content with having the Halloween special in or not having it. It makes me upset that the fans had the audacity to go to Danny’s channel and complain about it. That is complete wrong for fans to carry an issue to a different channel to spread. I felt so ashamed at the community that we would do that. I am using we because we all go down together. I felt like people treated Arin like a servant. Demanding the Halloween and complaining about it.

Arin, if you are reading this, I want to apologize for the rude and brash behavior that us as a community treated you. We know you are truly passionate about GG. You may feel like you needed to apologize for this but in my opinion you didn’t. I am glad you addressed this issue and took blame, but I think the real blame goes to the fans that assumed the worst out of you. True fans understand that you are human and a busy guy. I know you helping out other people other than yourself and I think that just adds to your character. I am so happy how much this channel has grown from Goof Troop and Kirby to this amazing channel that has a taste of everything. I will always be a fan you and I hope you accept this apology to understand that this would have never happened if people didn’t call you out, brought this issue to Danny’s channel, and made terrible assumptions. I cannot wait to see you perform live for the Final Party. I got a VIP pass and can’t wait. PS. Wolf is not a clone of Fox.

To my followers, I want to explain why I have not been posting on a daily basis. Blogging has changed my life and shows that I love writing. My issue is that I have a full time jobs that is 40-45 hours a weeks, a part time job that is on call when I am free, I work on commission, and I have been writing my books. Thank you for your patience and I hope you like this post.

Talkative Tuesday: Online Dating Cleanse

Online dating has slowly became the easiest way to find dates, and I am always for technology advancing to great lengths. What I have learned with these dating applications is quite a few lesson.

Bumble. Declared to be the best dating application for people looking for a great relationship. I believe it because the guys on the application are more relationship oriented. The first application that required a verification photo and filled with questions as ice breakers. My experience on Bumble was a boring experience. The guys on there were genuine but flakey. I do not like to wait for a guy to respond to me for a week to give me a reason why they could make it. We are adults, and they should not be afraid of rejection or hurting someone’s feelings. I have thick skin, and I don’t get offended easily. Guys may think they are doing us a favor by ignoring us, but they are making the situation worst in my opinion. Bumble may be a boring experience, but it was the best experience so far.

Tinder is where the iconic swipe left comes from. Easiest way to match with people with minimal effort. To me, this is an app where looks is more important than personality. The Netflix and chill definitely rooted from this app. If you are a type where you are looking for a deep connection, look somewhere else for that connection. Guys in here want to get to the point or play the game of cat and mouse. I rate this app a decent app for mature minded people, but amazing for college people that are shy. My experience was average, but I could do way better.

Last app is the worst app of them all. Grindr. This application is great for emotional manipulation, lustful people, liars, highly defensive people, toxic men, bored people, careless boys, childish men, cheaters, and many more. I hate this application. It was the worst. The men are cold, rude, annoying, and pretentious. They really have to get off their high horse and realize they are on the same application like everyone else. The reason why I didn’t leave sooner was because I thought this was the only way to meet someone for a hook up, date, hangout, or love without embarrassing myself by hitting on a straight man. The application made me think this is the best and ONLY way to meet love. In the past, I deleted the app but not the profile. I always thought well if this doesn’t work out then I’ll go back on grindr. My excuses were I have some guys on there I still chat with, it’s the best way to know if some is interested in men, it has good people on there, and so on. I did not realize that this app was toxic to my mentality. It made me believe love is just around the corner, the guy you saw in the store might be gay, or that online dating is for everyone. I could go on hours, but overall worst application. If you think love can happen in minutes, it doesn’t. I’m not saying to delete all the application for dating. I am saying that the app may not be as glamorous as advertised. There is nothing better than meeting your future lover in a place you love like a game, restaurant, the gym, or a dog park.

What I learned from each of these apps are valuable. Grindr taught me that true happiness starts with you. You can only get as much love as much as you love yourself. We cannot rely on someone else to make us purely happy. Tinder taught me that looks aren’t everything and if the person only care about your looks and don’t compliment on anything else, leave them be and know that you are amazing inside and out. Bumble taught me that quality guys can still have the same habits as terrible men. We do not deserve someone who makes us compromise everything.

Take care y’all. And love yourself and improve everyday.

Talkative Tuesday: Mukbang and Binge Eating Discipline

I am going to talk about a sensitive topic about eating and I am no means to offend anyone. This is a topic that I do want to talk about. If you do you need help or loved one, please contact 1-800-931-2237 

Mukbang. A very popular trend in Korea and started to trend in America. I just started watching some compilations of mukbangers. I realized how my appetite has decreased when I watch/listen to them. Seeing that amount of food causes me to lose my hunger levels. There is no hate for people that create that content. Promoting this lifestyle for people is an issue for us. Having these videos can give people the impression that they can eat large sum of food for money. Yes you have the choice, but people are not thinking for the consequences for their health. Does the money really outweigh the negative effects for your health? Once again, it is your choice. This does to my next topic about binge eating.

Binge eating happens during holidays, birthdays, and vacations. Food has a common pattern where people uses food for celebrations. It happens and we are human. Do not beat yourself up for binging during the weekend. People that are seeking to improve their eating habits are too harsh when they binge eat. Keep in mind, a day of binge will not make you gain 10 pounds. Mentality is what going to play huge role in weight loss or health improvements. Remember, you are improving your health for yourself. If binge eating happens. Don’t give up and keep in mind one bad meal went make you gain 25 pounds. I had a binge weekend and I ate foods like sushi, turkey chili, thin mints, popcorn, and so much more. I went from 186 to 187. I gained only a pound.  We feel in the moment we gained 20 pounds but in reality most of the binge turns into water weight. Please don’t criticize yourself because you had a binge. If you do struggle with binge eating and it happens constantly please consider seeking help. You are not alone and you can receive help and there is nothing to be ashamed of.

Some people exclaimed that some of their binge eating comes from their emotional ties to food. Many people use food as a comforting tool. In order for you to cut the ties, I would recommend start seeing food as a fuel source not as a support. Breaking that habit will help with your journey.

What are your thoughts about mukbangs?
Happy Talktive Tuesday!